Is All Behaviour a Choice? Understanding Child Development and ASD

Introduction

The idea that all behaviour is a choice—a conscious decision made by an individual—may seem logical at first glance. After all, we often assume that people can control their actions. However, when it comes to child development, particularly in children with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), this belief oversimplifies a much more complex reality.

In this blog post, we’ll explore what the research says about child behaviour, the role of brain development, and how ASD influences actions, ultimately challenging the notion that all behaviour is purely a matter of choice.

The Science of Behaviour: Is It Really a Choice?

1. Young Brains and Impulse Control

For behaviour to be a deliberate choice, children would need fully developed impulse control and reasoning skills—something that neuroscience tells us simply isn’t the case.

The prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for self-regulation, impulse control, and decision-making, is not fully developed in young children (Diamond, 2013). This means that many of their behaviours are impulsive or reactive rather than consciously chosen.

For example:

• A four-year-old throwing a tantrum because they can’t have a toy isn’t necessarily choosing to misbehave—they’re struggling with emotional regulation.

• A seven-year-old hitting a peer may not be intentionally aggressive but could lack the impulse control to manage frustration appropriately.

In other words, much of children's behaviour is not about willful disobedience but rather about where they are developmentally.

2. Autism and Behaviour: More Than Just "Choice"

For children with ASD, behaviour is even less about conscious decision-making and more about neurological responses, sensory processing, and communication challenges.

Sensory Processing Differences

Many children with ASD experience sensory hypersensitivity or hyposensitivity, meaning their nervous system reacts differently to environmental stimuli (Dunn, 1997). A child who covers their ears and screams in a loud classroom isn’t making a choice to be difficult—they are experiencing genuine sensory distress.

Executive Function Challenges

Children with ASD often struggle with executive functioning, which includes planning, impulse control, and adapting to change (Ozonoff et al., 1991). A child who refuses to transition to a new activity may not be deliberately defiant but rather overwhelmed by the sudden shift and unable to process it quickly.

Social and Communication Barriers

Because many children with ASD have difficulties understanding social cues and expressing their needs verbally, behaviours such as meltdowns, avoidance, or repetitive actions are often forms of communication, not conscious choices to misbehave (Prizant et al., 2006).

👉 Key Takeaway: Many behaviours in ASD are neurologically driven rather than intentional acts of defiance.

3. The Role of Environment in Behaviour

Beyond individual brain development, behaviour is also shaped by external factors, such as:

• Fatigue, hunger, or illness – A tired or hungry child is more likely to act out.

• Stress and anxiety – Changes in routine, unfamiliar environments, or overwhelming social situations can lead to behavioural outbursts.

• Reinforcement history – Children learn behaviours based on past experiences. If a child cries and gets what they want, they may continue that behaviour unconsciously—not as a manipulative choice, but as a learned response (Skinner, 1953).

Behaviour is best understood within the context of a child’s experiences and needs, rather than being labeled as purely intentional.

So, Is All Behaviour a Choice?

The short answer? No.

While some behaviours are deliberate, many are automatic responses to emotions, sensory input, and neurological differences—especially in children and even more so in those with ASD. Recognising this helps shift our perspective from blame to understanding, allowing us to respond with compassion, appropriate support, and effective strategies rather than punishment or frustration.

What Can We Do Instead?

At Mindfullink we encourage and implement skill building to help children and adults grow their skill and application in self-regulation, sensory stimulation and social development. We achieve this through a holistic approach using evidence-based practices and positive reinforcement.

By shifting from a “behaviour is a choice” mindset to a developmentally informed approach, we can better support all children—especially those with ASD—in navigating their world with success and confidence.

www.mindfullink.com.au

References

• Bowlby, J. (1969). Attachment and loss: Vol. 1. Attachment. Basic Books.

• Bronfenbrenner, U. (1979). The ecology of human development: Experiments by nature and design. Harvard University Press.

• Diamond, A. (2013). Executive functions. Annual Review of Psychology, 64, 135–168. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-113011-143750

• Dunn, W. (1997). The impact of sensory processing abilities on the daily lives of young children and their families: A conceptual model. Infants & Young Children, 9(4), 23-35. https://doi.org/10.1097/00001163-199704000-00005

• Mazefsky, C. A., Herrington, J., Siegel, M., Scarpa, A., Maddox, B. B., Scahill, L., & White, S. W. (2013). The role of emotion regulation in autism spectrum disorder. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 52(7), 679-688. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jaac.2013.05.006

• Ozonoff, S., Pennington, B. F., & Rogers, S. J. (1991). Executive function deficits in high-functioning autistic individuals: Relationship to theory of mind. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 32(7), 1081-1105. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1469-7610.1991.tb00351.x

• Prizant, B. M., Wetherby, A. M., Rubin, E., Laurent, A. C., & Rydell, P. J. (2006). The SCERTS model: A comprehensive educational approach for children with autism spectrum disorders. Brookes Publishing.

• Skinner, B. F. (1953). Science and human behavior. Macmillan.